like it is any different? it is only a demarkation of time passing. nothing new except the last digit.
grumpy i am

tired of chasing jobs, tired of chasing money. maybe it is time to go to a different job. just plain tired, it is not fun anymore.

a nice long one. from all the noise, and pressure and crap. Vacation did not do it. I was under pressure to go go go. I need to stop stop stop. It’s been total crap since I got home from vacation, and I am getting pretty tired of it. The goal for 2009 is to end the drama and noise. I have to formulate a plan and then do it. It may be that I sell the house and dump the debt and the drain on me. then I just have to deal with 2 old people. I think I can do that. getting tired of the drama of daughter. really getting on my nerves. and I am getting tired of the drain of Michael. he is just stressing me too much. Depending on how things go over the next month or so, I may be asking him to leave. I’ve had enough. but… first, lose weight so I can try to land a job somewhere and have a bit more steady income. the web stuff is good, but so stressful, having to constantly take on jobs and things that stress me even more. time to change it up a bit.

and with that. good morning

I got my new site design done. Now to populate the pages and get it running. yipppeeeeeee

I am not sure that I maybe should post this or not. But today, my daughter makes a decision that affects me. She is making the best one for her life and situation right now. It is the same as I would have made if I were in her shoes at her age. Or my age now. I am sad that she even ever had to make the decision, but I know that this guy is a deadbeat absent non-existant dad already, and will be that with her the minute that they break up, which won’t be long after birth. So she is terminating a 4 week pregnancy today.
We’ll mourn for a day, then tomorrow she has to go turn herself in for violation of probation in Manchester, her dad is taking her to that, and hope that the PO in Manchester was telling her the right thing in saying that she would probably not get put into jail, since she has no FTA and will let her out on her own. On Monday she starts down at OIC in the culinary arts program, for 12 weeks of training. Her job waitressing at a sports grill in the casino has been just plain horrible. There is no one in the casinos. Businesses are closing left and right. She expected to make 50-60 per shift. She makes 20-30. Not even minimum wage. Totally not worth the wear and tear on her.
With all of that, I am prepping for a few days with my parents. oh joy. Right after I finish up some work today, I have to go find a wireless router to use on their cable connection. I’ll need my laptop so that I am not driven crazy by them. I have a few things left to get for tday. I am SOOOOO not into it this year. I think I looked forward to having it here, and not having to drive all that way. Same for christmas. I want it here. I’ve driven elsewhere on christmas eve, every single fucking year. I want it at my house again, forever. there… ho ho ho
so sad.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2008/nov/15/malcolm-gladwell-outliers-extract

a pretty good read. so it really is practice and more practice

WWdN: In Exile: “…or else we didn’t win anything at all.”

Wil sees. Maybe. I hope that many others who feel the same way and want to gloat and be angry at those who did that same stuff to us, see. You become that hate if you continue it. Just on the other end of the spectrum. You are no better than those who hated us/you.

We are better than that.

I voted in my 37th consecutive election this morning

For once I felt that my vote counted.
my vote for Gore was important, but the election was stolen from him and us. So this vote means more.